Turning and Burning

Ok, so I am thinking, as I eat this apple (very tasty apple), that we are surrounded by lava. In fact the whole Earth is burning. No shit. And in the midst of it all, we stay cool. Well, most of us do. We avoid the fire around us. And we have to, we have shit to do. We are “very busy people.”

Most days I am proud that I have no problem finding inner peace, and staying cool when surrounded by the typical, daily mayhem of modern life. I go into the mind cave. I make everything around me move in slow motion. I watch the world like a movie reel that is slowly turning. A fluid carousel of pictures, I put them in frames in my brain. Some I wish I could hang on my walls. Just plaster my fucking walls in mental images; a god damn massive memory collage of frozen life. Like when I saw the brother and sister who cried and fell to their knees at the airport when reunited. Or when I looked down on the tumultuous city of La Paz, or out at the endless sea before I jumped off that bridge in Cadiz.

But back to this fire that is raging and we are ignoring. At night, I close my eyes; listen to the outside sounds seeping through my windows. I breathe in and out with purpose. I sense my surroundings, like a ninja (for real, you didn’t know I was a ninja?), all while craziness, I still can’t seem to hear, is happening. Weather is changing, lava is boiling, tectonic plates may be shifting, drug deals are occurring, guns are firing, babies are born, someone isn’t eating, someone else may be vomiting, and I am typing. All kinds of crazy shit is happening all the time. And then here we are…just plugging along. La ti dah. La ti fucking dah.

Sometimes I wonder; does the world need more firefighters?

quest.Ion.s

Everything is overwhelmingly interesting. I have an extreme desire to live forever because even forever cannot exhaust the infinity of knowledge that is always one step ahead of me. Like an ever rising helium balloon, that is never fully graspable, you reach and reach, coming close to holding it and bringing it to your level, but sometimes close is still so far away. There is so much in this world beyond our mental grasp. I love trying to reach it, even though I know I never will. There will always be more to know, there will always be more questions. If you stop questioning, you're dead.

I would love to do a study regarding the varied consciousness levels on the psychological interruption that occurs because of the two dimensional communication that usurps our physical presence at times. All this was prompted by a trip to Mad Mex with Stacey. We both left our phones in our purse, commented on the conscious decision to do so, and simultaneously noticed so many around us very busy fondling their phones. We decided to check out the unique art on the walls, the neat lantern lights dangling above the bar, and the young people around us. We talked with a gay couple beside us. We learned about a new band playing locally. We were present in our three dimensional space. We did not mentally shift our focus to a two dimension reality that encroaches on our psyche in ways we may not realize. In ways we may not understand. What do we miss when we are busy worrying about what we're missing? What do we miss when our minds are present in multiple dimensions at once?

There are so many questions that I have about our social, psychological, and physical fibers that connect us. There are so many questions that I have, period. I watched history lectures on Youtube by a UC Davis professor. So, at the same time that I question our connectedness, I utilize it to study my inquiries. My curiosity is a product of its existence, and it is satiated by it as well.

Positive, negative, positive, negative. Whenever you breathe out, I am breathing in.